How to create raving fans that refer you business!

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Emerson once said, “What you do speaks so loudly that I can’t hear what you say!”

This is an incredible business insight. How many people work to promote their business by “speaking so loudly about their business” that people are turned off and never get to see what they can “do for the prospective client in their business.” There is a reason for the saying, “Actions speak louder than words.”

Business owners today will create a lot more success if they remember that prospective clients are watching what they do, often times more than anything they say. Businesses are constantly critiqued by the small courtesies that distinguish them from their competition.

  • For example, after a lunch and a business card exchange, do you immediately send the other person a invitations through social media to stay connected?
  • If someone really goes out of their way to help, do you send a “thank you” card?
  • What is your referral bonus? And if you have one…does it include a personal touch?

I know for me personally, I network a lot and everytime I meet someone new and they say, “Let’s do lunch sometime!” I immediately pull out the iPhone and say, “Great, let’s set up a time now!” If they don’t commit or respond with “Send me some times by email and we’ll connect,” I never follow up. When I pull out my phone, I am saying in that moment, “I value you and your time and I value me and my time, do you?” If they push it off on me to follow up with them, chances are, I will end up chasing them and that’s not who I want to do business with.

  • How do you answer your phone? How do you handle a cancellation when contractually, you are right but the customer wasn’t happy? Do you accommodate them or go by the “rules?”

You would be surprised why people are turned off by using a business or company. And while you can’t be everything to everyone; remember Emerson’s quote, “What you do speaks so loudly that I can’t hear what you say!”

To your continued success,

James
(919) 745-7569

PS-Comment below on what you have “done” in your business that spoke loudly with a client that you didn’t need to say anything.

Perseverance…the Key to Success!

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“Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education alone will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.”
― Calvin Coolidge

Let’s talk for a moment about Persistence. If this is a behavioral trait that creates success, how is it defined? Webster’s defines persistence as, “the steady pursuit of what is undertaken.”

Let’s go one step deeper. What allows someone to be persistent? I like the term perseverence. Webster defines this as, “to continue from a determination of will not to give up.” Would you like to persevere a little more in achieving something more in life?

My 9-year old daugher came home from school at the end of last year with a brilliant homework assignment. She had been tasked to build an acronym for Perseverance. Here is the best way to persist or persevere in any endeavor:

P – Practice
E – Endurance
R – Respect to yourself
S – Set your mind on a goal
E – Encourage yourself
V – Venture with your luck
E – Even though impossible, go try
R – Retry and don’t let yourself give up
A – Ask questions
N – Never say “can’t”
C – Can’t give up
E – Everything will go well

Success in any endeavor is accomplished with perseverance. Those are some pretty great belief systems and things to keep in the front of your mind as you move forward towards your goals. They also help to cut down that most dreaded of all obstacles in the pursuit of our goals: FEAR. I love this quote from Winston Churchill.

“Sure I am this day we are masters of our fate, that the task which has been set before us is not above our strength; that its pangs and toils are not beyond our endurance. As long as we have faith in our own cause and an unconquerable will to win, victory will not be denied us.”
― Winston Churchill

In any endeavor you must put in the time and persevere until you achieve your goals. Even if the fear is there day in and day out. Persevere and you will always cross the finish line.

To your continued success,

James

“How Three Cigars Changed the Course of American History!” (…and the lesson can change yours!)

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Managing all the life’s details is hard work. The key is to remember that sometimes the most important details are hidden withing things we might overlook at first glance. It’s important to stop from time to time; focus on what’s important and remember to look for what we might be missing. Here’s an example from the book, “The Greatest Stories Never Told” by Rick Beyer.

Confederate General Robert E Lee was looking for a decisive victory in the fall of 1862. If the South could score a powerful victory against the North, it may have been possible for them to gain the support of the European nations as an independent country.

General Lee boldly marched his troops North and invaded. As a result, he was pursued by a very cautious Northern General, George McClellan. Being very indecisive and lacking self confidence, McClellan tentatively searched throughout Maryland and agonized about what to do.

As luck would have it, three of McClellan’s men from an Indiana regiment camped overnight in an area previously occupied by General Lee’s troops. As the men were spreading out to bed down, one of them spotted a small envelope containing three cigars and one piece of paper. The men thought is was their lucky day because of the cigars but it was much more than that.

The paper just happened to be the the marching orders for Lee’s troops. One of Lee’s Asistant Adjutant General’s had obviously lost them on the field days before. As a result, McClellan got the confidence he needed and was motivated to move. He ended up winning one of the most bloody and decisive battles of the Civil War: the Battle of Antietam.

What are the small, yet extremely important tasks that may be hidden from your immediate view this week?

Is there something important you need to keep track of and have misplaced it?

What are the actions that must happen even at the inconvenience of others?

What do you need to ask for help to find?

Those three cigars and the critical information inside changed the course of history for the 5,000 men who died and the 20,000 who were wounded that bloody day.

Stay focused on the actions this week will change your life and don’t move on until you make sure they are completed and everything is in its right place.

In Business, “What are the KEY REVENUE GENERATING Activities that MUST be done?”

In Personal, “What are the KEY FINANCIAL, HEALTH, SPIRITUAL & RELATIONSHIP Activities that MUST be done?

Look past the envelopes and cigars to find your marching orders for the week. Keeping track of the small things in life, really does make a difference!

Amazing coaching specials are happening here at Evolution for Success in the month of July. Call TODAY and discover how you can get complimentary access to an entire online sales & marketing academy when you sign up for a 6 or 12-month contract.

Also, did you contemplate a Coaching Career? Or maybe, you just wanted to learn the skills and tools to integrate into your business practice. Whatever the case may be, stay tuned for details about an upcoming Coaching Certification in Fall 2013. You can, and will learn all of the best coaching tools that include the psychology of achievement and a proven sales/marketing curriculum.

Happiness Formula Revealed…

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If you are looking for the magic formula for more “HAPPINESS,” look no further. Like all new ways of thinking and believing, they stick around longer when they are anchored into our neurology. Take this 31 day Happiness Challenge everyday in July and see how your life changes in the next month. Here are the steps:

1. Journal:
A. List three problems that you are thankful for (the reasons you are thankful must be to remind you something you know you are in the core of your being or what there is to learn from the problem, the learning of which will empower you with a new belief that will better you. Example, “I am thankful that I am scared to death of making these business cold calls this week because it will help be breakthrough my fear of being good enough, overcome caring so much about what other people think of me, and allow my business to go the next level by brining in clients and revenue so that I can take another vacation and help another person change their life)
B. Journal any other thoughts, ideas or concepts worth nothing and thank your unconscious mind for giving you those ideas and insights (regardless of if they are negative or positive)

2. Exercise: Put some form of physical movement in your day. A minimum of 20-minutes out in the sun for some vitamin D. Anything to get some additional oxygen to your mind and body, get your lymph system going and get those natural feel good drugs released (as my daughter says, “get those ‘indoor-friends’ moving” (endorphins)

3. Meditation: Meditation is proven to support a healthier immune system, relaxation and stress release. To get in the habit I suggest just meditating to your favorite song without words. Or, sit in your car before or after work for as little as just two minutes and clear your mind, practice turning off your brain.

4. Perform one meaningful, random act of kindness. It has to be meaningful which means it involves something that is emotional. An example, everytime I take my kids to McD’s, I ALWAYS put my change and a few dollars in the Ronald McDonald box because I know what they did for one of my clients who they supported when his son needed a brain operation. It immediately fills my heart with thankfulness and I think of the families in need who will have kids in similiar situations and all the good it will do for them.

Feelings need to be cultivated. They need to be cared for, watered, nurtured and supported so they can grow and produce fruit! Try this challenge for 31-days with me and see how it changes your life.

TO your continued success,

James

PS-Email me at James@evolutionforsuccess with the word “Happiness” in the subject line and I will gladly send you a daily “Happiness” form you can use for the month of July.

You have problems, compared to what…?

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Bad Monday

Are you having a bad day? I thought I was one day last week. I was going to be late for an appointment and I was really frustrated since being late is one of my pet peeves. My frustration level grew as I turned off the highway and my forward progress came to a screeching halt. In front of me was an accident and a long line of backed up cars. As I took the detour in front of me, I snapped the picture you see in the post above. An interesting thing happened as I drove past this accident. Somehow, seeing the plight of this truck driver, putting myself in his shoes, and thinking about the phone call he was going to have to make to his boss put my problem (frustrated by being 10 minutes late) into perspective.

One of the greatest questions I ask clients when they are frustrated and angry at a problem in life is, “OK, its bad, but compared to what?” As human beings, it is easy to get wrapped up in OUR life, OUR problems, OUR perspectives, and OUR beliefs. To jumpstart the process of getting a person out of their OWN way so they can work to a solution, just ask, “Compared to what?” When we shift our attention to the plight of others, the challenges of others, the life circumstances of others (that we can relate too) it helps to put things into a different perspective. When you can shift your “referential index,” how you are referring to something, with a different perspective, it lessens the emotional impact so you can think more clear and see the opportunities to think or do something different.

It is not to be used as a justification for NOT doing something different but a means of getting unstuckk so you can find a new solution and take action to achieve a different outcome. Next time you are stuck and think something in your life really stinks…just state the problem and then ask yourself, “Ok, this stinks but compared to what?” So you thought you were having a bad day, compared to what?

In the end, my ten minutes late was nothing compared to the delays this driver faced, his boss faced, and their clients and their customers may have faced. It’s good to keep life in perspective.

If you are feeling stuck and frustrated with your job, career, relationships or finances…CALL today to schedule your Introductory Strategy Session to start moving forward again. (919) 792-0085

To your continued success,

James

January Promotion…Enter to win a FREE Color Nook!

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Is your commitment to your 2012 New Year Resolution fading fast?

Is this going to be another year of telling yourself, “I know what I need to do, I just need to do it!”

And still nothing happens, except looking in the mirror feeling like a failure.

There are three steps to creating change and achieving your New Year’s Resolutions:

  1. Create a “compelling” vision that is clear, concise & focused
  2. Get the best tools possible to get there; a map, mentor & coach
  3. Resolve the inner conflicts that prevent your success

Most people can get step number one completed but they stop there.

Perhaps they even get a great coach, mentor or map, but still fail to get results.

The Solution: All Learning, Change & Behavior happens at the unconscious level. It is not about logically “knowing” what you need to do. You need a coach or mentor that will help you to identify and resolve your inner conflicts first. The second step then becomes creating the new habits and behaviors for success.

That is where most people and most coaches fail. Unless someone is trained in how to not only identify the conflicts, but get their clients to resolve them, change never happens at the rate people desire. It takes a very long time!

If your coach or mentor does not have the experience to see the patterns of thinking and behavior that are causing conflict and the skills of NLP, Hypnosis, or Time Line Therapy to resolve them, you are going to fail at your New Year Resolutions.

Call or email today for a Complimentary Strategy Session to make good on your New Year’s Resolutions!

You will identify a clear “compelling” vision, get the best mentor and coach, and have an experience with NLP, Hypnosis and/or Time Line Therapy® in every session to Accelerate Your Success and achieve Rapid Results.

Between now & January 31, 2012 for every person you refer for a Complimentary Strategy Session, you will be entered to win a Color Nook from Barnes & Noble!!! Drawing on February 1, 2012.

You can have the life you have dreamed of this year. It is waiting for you!

To your continued success,

James M. Murphy

Executive & Life Coach
Powerful, Proven Strategies to Generate More Business and Create an Amazing Personal Life!
(919) 792-0085 Office
(919) 745-7569 Direct

Is Life Coaching and Executive Coaching Effective? Experts Speak Out

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Whether you’re interested in Executive Coaching or Life Coaching, personal coaching can help you get unstuck or perform better.

Here is what others have to say:

 

“Who exactly seeks out a coach? Winners who want even more out of life.”  – Chicago Tribune

 

“People who use a career coach find jobs 15% to 46% faster than those who don’t, according to a study by talent management firm Lee Hecht Harrison.”
– Wall Street Journal Jan. 2009

 

“Business Coaching is attracting America’s top CEO’s because, put simply, business coaching works. Asked for a conservative estimate of the the monetary payoff from the coaching they got, these managers described an average return of more than $100,000, or about six times what the coaching had cost their companies.”
– FORTUNE Magazine Feb 2001

 

“A coach may be the guardian angel you need to rev up your career.”
– MONEY Magazine

 

“If ever stressed out corporate America could use a little couch-time, it’s now. Trust in big companies is at an all-time low. Baby-boomers have been burned; Gen Xers aren’t expecting the Corporation to take care of them. Under the circumstances, employees are much likelier to go outside and get independent advice to help them be better managers.”
– Karen Cates, Northwestern’s Kellogg Graduate School of Management

 

“Between 25 percent and 40 percent of Fortune 500 companies use executive coaches.”
– Suvey, The Hay Group, International

 

“Across corporate America, coaching sessions at many companies have become as routine for executives as budget forecasts and quota meetings.”
– Investors Business Daily

 

“Coaches are not for the meek. They’re for people who value unambiguous feedback. All coaches have one thing in common, it’s that they are ruthlessly results-oriented.”
– Fast Company Magazine

 

“Coaching is the universal language of change and learning.”
– CNN

 

“Executives and HR managers know coaching is the most potent tool for inducing lasting personal change.”
– Ivy Business Journal

 

“Part therapist, part consultant, part motivational expert, part professional organizer, part friend, part nag — the personal coach seeks to do for your life what a personal trainer does for your body.”
– Minneapolis-St. Paul Star-Tribune

“Once used to bolster troubled staffers, coaching now is part of the standard leadership development training for elite executives and talented up-and-comers at IBM, Motorola, J.P. Morgan, Chase, and Hewlett Packard. These companies are discreetly giving their best prospects what star athletes have long had: a trusted adviser to help reach their goals.”
– CNN.com

 

“Got a nagging feeling that your life could be more fulfilling? Want to change direction but aren’t sure how to do it? Here’s how to jump start your new life today … Hire a personal coach.”
– Modern Maturity

 

“Increasingly, nonprofit executives and managers are finding coaches a terrific sounding board and source of help in a demanding and complex job.”
– Nonprofit World

 

“The goal of coaching is the goal of good management: to make the most of an organization’s valuable resources.”
– Harvard Business Review

 

“An Ethics Resource Center study found that 90% of employees value leaders with integrity as highly as they value income. The Manchester survey of 140 companies shows nine in 10 executives believe coaching to be worth their time and dollars. The average return was more than $5 for each $1 spent.”
– The Denver Post

 

“What’s really driving the boom in coaching, is this: as we move from 30 miles an hour to 70 to 120 to 180……as we go from driving straight down the road to making right turns and left turns to abandoning cars and getting motorcycles…the whole game changes, and a lot of people are trying to keep up, learn how not to fall.”– John Kotter, Harvard Business School

“If you are inspired, you don’t need motivation.”  – Thomas Leonard, Father of Coaching 1955-2003

You DO NOT have to let fear limit the way you live your life!

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No matter what your phobia is, and regardless of how long you have been inconvenienced by it, 
your phobia can be cured!
You do not have to let fear limit the way you live your life.  
NLP has been proven to be one of the most effective ways to remove a phobia.  In fact, clearing phobias is what NLP was made famous for!
Whether you are dealing with a fear of flying, a fear of spiders or snakes, or claustrophobia, you know better than anyone how much these fears not only negatively impact your life but often also impact the lives of the ones you love.  
It doesn’t have to be that way!  You can be free of those limitations.  In 2 (pain free) sessions you can live life fully and on your own terms!
What is a phobia?
A phobia is an intense irrational fear. The root cause of the phobia can usually be traced back to an emotionally charged event when a biological response became associated at an unconscious level with a particular trigger or stimulus.  When re-presented with the trigger, such as being in a closed in space for instance, the associated response is triggered, most commonly resulting in extreme feelings of anxiety, fear and panic.
How can we remove a phobia?
Using Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), any phobia can be eliminated quickly and easily without medication and without the painful process deconditioning. There is no side effect and the results are immediate since NLP addresses the source of the phobia and not the symptoms.
The process consists of 2 sessions.  Sessions can be conducted in person if you live in the Raleigh area or over the phone, and last 45 minutes.  
From now until the 4th of July–just in time for the fireworks–, I would like to offer you, your family and your friends a special pricing of $225 for both sessions!  
Call today to get started and
Experience the freedom of life without fears or phobias!
919-745-7569

Are you taking steps toward what you want?

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When would you like to make your first million? When would you like to find and marry your soul mate? When would you like to drop those extra pounds so you look good this summer? When would you like to find a better sense of peace in your life? When would you like to get to that next promotion and pay raise at work?
If you are like most people, the answer to all of these questions is easy. I am sure you would like to have had it all yesterday! Maybe a person could settle for right now, but yesterday would probably have been better!
It is true that whatever you want, you can’t have it yesterday. However, you can choose to take action towards those results right now. If you want that million dollars and pass on making that extra payment to pay off your debt, you are missing out on having that million dollars for now. If you fail to smile and just say hello to that attractive guy or gal at the grocery store, you might be missing out on your soul mate. If you don’t leave just one more bite of food on your plate than you did yesterday, you are missing out on that great beach body. 
A person may say, “But James, that one extra payment, smile, and bite of food are not enough!” Says who? If you are not willing to manage your money and will waste an opportunity to take a step toward being debt free, how can you manage a million? If you are not willing to give more than you expect back in a relationship and pass on a smile that may make someone’s day go from bad to great, how can you emotionally support your soul mate? If you can’t pass on that one bite of food and eat 40 less calories at every meal (840 calories a week is almost 1/3 lb), then how will you be able to manage passing on all of the deserts when you are out with friends so you can feel fantastic on the beach?
Managing your life comes down to managing moments. If the small results are not enough for you to acknowledge and appreciate, you may never have the appreciation for attaining the end goal. We are the ones who make things bigger, harder, and more difficult than they need to be. Why not make feeling good about yourself and your actions be easy? How many more happy people would there be in the world. Life is only as difficult as you make it! 
The key to getting results NOW is to manage and appreciate the moments and the immediate actions you take right now in order to make a difference in your life.  
To  your continued success, 
James

Do You Need to Stretch?

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The Boring Life of an Office Supply 
If you are like me, you may be scared to open the desk drawer that holds all of your office supplies. All of those jumbled up rubber bands, paperclips, staples, thumb tacks, and the pad of sticky notes that has become torn apart and has desk lint stuck to the back. If you were one of these poor mixed up office supplies, what a boring life you would lead. They just sit there all day in a jumbled up mess, ignored and waiting to be used. 
Have you ever felt that way? Have you ever felt all jumbled up and confused? Have you felt bored, ignored by others and waiting for something to happen? Have you felt you were living but not really fulfilling your life’s purpose?
There is a solution. Rubber bands need to be stretched in order to hold things together that would otherwise fall apart. Paperclips need tension put on them to hold important papers together that have innovative thoughts, stories and ideas on them. Staples need to separate from the group and be bent in new ways to link thoughts and ideas together long term. Thumb tacks need to be focused and pushed into a specific area to keep things in the line of sight and visible to others. The sticky notes need to be written on with ideas, moments of brilliance and reminders of what is important in life. 
Office supplies take on an exciting life when they are used for their intended purpose. The only thing keeping office supplies from having a life of meaning and fulfillment is that they are dependent on others to use them. 
Thank goodness that we, as humans, are not dependent on others in order to be stretched and used for a purpose! What a gift it is to be able to choose the purpose of our life and how we stretch, put tension on ourselves, and use the gifts we inherently have! 
It is up to you to choose a meaning and purpose for your life today. Let that purpose guide you to make a difference by uniting people or ideas together for a common cause.  Put some tension on yourself, separate from the pack, bend yourself and stretch in a new way, and write down your important thoughts and ideas for later reference. Take action to get yourself out of the drawer and do what you were meant to do. Be free from living the Boring Life of an Office Supply. 
To your continued Success,
James
919.792.0085 
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Is Your Message Not Getting Through?

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Effective communication is one of the most challenging issues for anyone working in a team such as a business or organization.  With so many different personality types working together, trying to tailor your communication strategy to each one can be daunting.

The Compliment Sandwich method is a classic and effective tool that we often forget to use.  It is one of the easiest and most effective ways to communicate anything to any personality style.  The conversation will feel genuine and flow smoothly provided that the positive feedback/compliments are genuine and related to your concern(s), and that you do not overuse that technique so that your words don’t seem contrived.

The idea is to start with some positive feedback (the bread), followed by the issue you need to address (the meat of your message), and finish with another compliment or positive feedback (the second piece of bread).  The part that is most overlooked however is the verbiage you use in between the compliments and the main message itself.  Stay away from words like “but”, “although”, or “however”.  The immediate response to those words is defensiveness.  They directly void any positive feedback —however sincere— you started with.

Let’s say that you are having an issue with a team member spending an increasing amount of time at work on personal matters.  You might approach the person this way: 

“John,  We love having you as a part of this team.  Your idea at yesterday’s sales meeting was right on point! AND in fact it’s clear that you have a real impact on our corporate culture in the office; a lot of the junior associates take their cues from you.

So it’s crucial that you limit the time you spend on personal matters whether it be on the phone or online to the times when you are officially on break.  

I know how committed you have been to this organization and I appreciate all your work especially for this last project.  It made a difference.”

Now, let’s add one more concept into the process. There are three different types of postures you can adopt when communicating with someone: authoritative, participative, or subordinate. An authoritative posture is always direct and to the point: “it’s crucial that you do xyz”.  Your main message —the meat of the sandwich— is ALWAYS authoritative so the corrective action is clear and concise. The positive feedbacks or compliments —the bread— are  ALWAYS participative: “We love you being part of the team”.  You are not posturing down or up, you are simply delivering a genuine compliment as one person to another.

We always have a choice on how we

To your continued success,
James